Up there with death and taxes, divorce is the last topic most people want to talk about. After all, ending a marriage can launch you into painful feelings of failure, disappointment, stress, and regret. While most people do recover from a divorce, the process can take a toll on the health as you face an expensive and lengthy legal process, move out of your home, renegotiate your situation because an excellent co-moms and dad (if you have kids), divide up your social network, and rebuild your sense of self without your partner.

While the overall divorce rate fell 18% from 2008 to 2016, divorce remains an everyday reality: About 40% of marriages end in dissolution, and around 1 million couples cut the cord every year, per a 2015 data for the Psychosomatic Drug.

While every and each matrimony ends up for assorted reasons (that could disagree based on hence partner you may well ask), the new “why” behind a split up can often be tracked back into a comparable basic issues that avoid any dating, away from bad correspondence appearance to help you a loss in trust in brand new aftermath away from betrayal.

When you or your partner begins to see your marriage in a primarily negative light, you’re headed for trouble, says Shirin Peykar, a licensed ily therapist based in Sherman Oaks, CA. It can eventually become impossible to imagine your marriage improving, which in turn makes you feel hopelessness and more apt to dismiss, minimize, or even reframe positive interactions as negative, she explains.

So, whether you’re worried about a seven-seasons itch, feeling disrupted by blank colony disorder, or simply feel like you’re growing apart, it helps to know what must be done making a marriage history as well as what might bring yours down. Read on for nine of the most common reasons married couples end up calling it quits, according to relationship experts-and real women who have been there.

step one. Insufficient love and you can passion

Can’t remember the last time you said “I love you” or held your partner’s hand? In a survey of 2,371 divorcees, nearly half blamed a lack of love and you will intimacy, making it the most common reason for ending a study in the Diary out-of Sex bolivian hot women & Marital Treatment.

“In general, a lack of passion is a sign that your marriage is in serious trouble,” says Terry Gaspard, a licensed clinical social worker and author of The fresh Remarriage Manual. “Emotional and sexual intimacy go hand in hand, and without these elements, couples will often drift apart because they don’t feel connected.”

“My personal first spouse was indeed a people, but he was psychologically unavailable. Over the years, I discovered you to impact alone in the context of a wedding was not match for me, so i decided to get a splitting up.” -Carol D., 64

dos. Marrying too young

While it might not be the first thing you think of, marrying young is a well-established risk factor for divorce. Case in point: Couples who got married as teens in the 1970s and 1980s were twice as likely to end up getting a divorce compared to those who married at later ages, per an post when you look at the This new Magazines out of Gerontology.

Sometimes, the pressure to tie the knot at an arbitrary milestone (like after graduation or before 30) or the desire to have the Pinterest-perfect wedding can push young couples into committing to the wrong person, says Andrea Liner, Psy.D. a licensed clinical psychologist and owner of Flux Therapy in Denver, Colorado. As you mature, you might find that your relationship isn’t stable, you’re not as well-matched as you thought, or other options look more attractive.